1. Ever wonder about those people who spend $3.00 a piece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards.
2. Isn't designating a smoking section in a restaurant like designating a peeing section in a swimming pool?
3. If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea...does that mean that one enjoys it?
4. What really is the sound of one hand clapping?
5. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?
6. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
7. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?
8. Why is a person who plays the piano, called a pianist but a person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?
9. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?
10. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
11. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
12. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
13. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks , so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
14. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?
15. If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
16. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive
17. Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
18. If a cow laughed, would milk come out of her nose?